I say that it was the best summer of my life after each summer. And this summer is no exception. I have one week to make this summer best of the best summer in my life. But I'm not sure that I can do it.

To all the ships on the sea and to all the ports. To all my friends, my family and strangers. This is a message and a prayer. The message is that during my trips I found a great truth. I have already found what everybody is looking for… and few find: the person for whom I was born to love. Somebody like me, from Outer Banks county… from the mysterious Atlantic. A person rich in simple values… a person who learnt on his own. A port in which I am always at home. The wind, the problems… or a little death can’t destroy this house. I pray for all the people to know such love and to recover from it. If my prayer is listened to, there won’t be guilt any more, or regrets. Neither anger. Please, God. Amen!

Have you ever been in love? I'm not. I don't know why. A few years ago I always thought I was too young. But when I looked at my peers, I immediately remembered this phrase: “То love all ages yield surrender”. I understood that phrase completely wrong. I thought it was for old people. So here is my story. In my life there was one person, but now he is only in my head, in my dreams, and maybe even in my heart. It was a strange familiarity in the Internet. He wrote me and claimed that his friend was with me in the camp. But it was just an excuse to write to me, I think so. This story is very long and complicated. The fact that I wasn’t be able to reciprocate. We stopped to chat. But fate drove us several times. After two years, after fleeting meetings, I realized that I miss him. But his feelings for me were not the same. I'm so sorry that all time told him: Let's be just friends? And when I heard it from him, I realize what a pain to hear such a response. He still means something to me. But I don't think it's love. Because we were never close (well, you know what I mean). And now he has changed. It was quite different. I may be wrong. I just made this conclusion by looking at the photos. There is no such determination, to write him to ask how he's doing or something else. I'm afraid of. Don't know why, but I'm afraid. Maybe to be rejected. I’m very afraid of.

I just want to cry all night

Hi
You noticed that I hadn't been writing for a long time. I can explain you why. Because it's summer time. I just want to relax and enjoy my holiday. In previous posts I wrote that I don't like summer. More precisely I don't like heat. So I'm happy that this summer is not hot. It's raining last a few days. I really like it. By the way, I don't like swimming because I am afraid depth. It sounds strange but it's true. I didn't swim for 4 years. It all started with the fact that I had a dream that I was someone drags down while I was swimming. And I had this dream several times. So I decided not to swim because of fear. But as I study in the university and the program includes a pool. So I should go to pool. Every time I go with fear.
I'm sure that everyone has phobias. This is normal. I want to advise you share your fears with someone. It helps you to become more free.

Have a nice day, my dears
XO

Hi everybody! How are you? How is your summer? Do you enjoy this time?
As for me, I like summer only because I have holiday. So I really like doing nothing. I just relax and get pleasure in this time. I can do a lot of things and it is not to study. I can watch films, series. I can read books. I can go for a walk. I can do everything what I want. And it's cool.
But I didn't want to talk about it.
Honestly, I like to speak on philosophical topics, for example, what is your aspiration in life? This question makes you wonder. Can you write me what is your aspiration in life? And then I will write about mine. Please, don't ignore me.

I can't believe! Finally. I am able to go on holiday. All my exams passed successfully. Hallelujah I'm free. My happiness has no limit. I can do whatever I want now. It's so cool.

It's so good when you can do everything what you want and when you are in a good mood. But your mood changes when you remember that the exam will be tomorrow. Fortunately, this is the last my exam. And I will have psychological practice. After all this I will be able to go on holiday. Finally.
Honestly I don't like summer. I don't know why. I probably liked its when I was a schoolgirl because I had vacation without any exams and practices. I really like an early spring, when the air is fresh and the sun shines brightly, the birds begin to sing, there are new leaves and blossoms on the trees. It is so wonderful. And it doesn't matter that I have classes. But anyway every season has its own beauty.

Evening or night is time when I want to write. And my mind is full different thought. But now I want to tell you about one book. You probably will know its. This book is named "The Girl on the Train". I always like to read books about love and things like that. I read all books by Nicklas Sparks in my school time. I like that in his books I can see and feel real love and a piece of tragedy. It was made me cry and think about the little things. But now I am a student. I am a big girl :) ahaha. And I decided that it's time to change my style in books. So I bought book "The Girl on the Train". It's such a complicated story that I couldn't stop to read. The main character is Rachel. And I really fall in love. I hope you understand me right. I mean that her character, her behavior, her thought likes me. Her courage and determination is just incredible. To my mind the story is very typical but it didn't stop me to love this book. So if you don't know what to read you should read "The Girl on the Train". It will be a good choice for you especially if you're about 18-25.
_____

If you read this book you should give me know and tell about your feelings about it.

I'm so happy that I'm here. But I should go to my bed. Because it's rather late. I can't promise that I will write every day, but I want to try to do it. I want to tell you about me, my life, my thoughts. And of course, I can write nonsense like this, ahaha. I'm just writing what I think. And I'm really sorry if it looks strange and awful. I'm new.

Would you like to get to know me?
I always wanted to have my own place where I can express my feelings, thoughts and so on. And I probably found it. OMG. It's happened again. When you have possibility to write you fall into a stupor. It's so awful. In my childhood I wanted to be a teacher or a writer. Bit I'm not sure that my speech is correct. I don't talk about grammatically mistake I mean that my speech is not highly educated. But I promise I will try to change it. I have a big chance to improve my skills. And I don't miss this opportunity:)